Flying Without Wingzzz....

i'm missing my chubby pie badly now. and this blog has long been abandoned by the mummy blogger. :-s

SOS! i need help.....i need a break NOW! :p

ok...what better way to de-stress at work than to update a cobweb blog :p as per someone's suggestion, i'm updating pictures of my chubby pie. so here it goes....

chubby pie @ 1mth 3 weeks young :p

she looked like a big girl, doesnt she? =D cian chubby pie. everything else is growing well except for the thinning hair. cant imagine her bald! *faints*

dress courtesy from aunty ezayu, zany, eryanta, diana


chubby pie on national day =D

semangat menyambut kemerdekaan negara. pic taken otw (reads: on the way) to my in-laws place.

dress courtesy from ya'yie (FIL)

notice how i took the pain to indicate whose dresses my chubby pie is modelling? well....simply put in words....the mummy hasnt bought her any clothes just yet. stingy mummy, you say? nooooo!! it's just that she's got too many new dresses to dorn that i dont find it necessary to go shopping yet. she's growing fast and i made sure she's wearing every little dresses she's got before she's outgrown them.

........and of all the many tops/pants/dresses that she has, i think she prefers to be in this :-

see how happy she is *shakes head*

i cant wait to clear the remaining leave i have - 16 days (maternity leave), 3.5 days annual leave (balance of 10 days bring forward to 2007), 3 days childcare leave - all to be cleared by end dec 2006. *jiggy* and the boss is not aware of the accumulated number of leave i had. im sure he's gonna drown in cold sweat. lol!

dum dee dum dum.....


*starts planning for leave time table*

ok here comes the long awaited labour experience. heh! i know it's been 2 mths now but better late than never, right? ;-)



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during my 38th week appointment, the gynae told me that if i dont deliver by next week ie. wednesday, 7th june 2006, she'd induced me as my amniotic sac (or commonly known as waterbag) is thinning. i thought i'd be able to deliver on my edd which is 11 june - my mom's birthday. unfortunately, it posed risks if i were to hold on longer. i was scared. i heard that induced labor is painful and im scared of pain. so i kept praying that the baby will come out soon.

the day came, where my appointment date was set at 2pm. so the night before i was restless trying to imagine being in labor. i managed to sleep for 2-3 hrs when i woke up to call of nature and later had a light snack (a glass of HL milk and some biscuits) at 3am in the morning. went to sleep thereafter only to be awakened with some hard nudge n elbow from the babe inside which was followed with intense pain and then i felt water coming out of me. i thought i had accidentally peed and tried to control the flow but it doesnt stop. so i lay still till the flow stopped. checked my mattress; weird - no wetness.

slowly i got up and walked to the toilet to wash up. i was astonished to discover a tinge of pinky discharge and some wetness on the pad. i thought my waterbag has leaked but i remembered reading on the net and in the book that when waterbag burst, the water came gushing out heavily but mine wasnt. it was urine-like flow. but the 1st sign gave way though - the pinky discharge. i then decided to wait and timed the contractions.

during all this drama, the husband and mother were not aware of the situation. i was waiting and waiting and waiting......no contraction pain. by then, i'd wet my pad again. so this is it - im going into labor. weeeeeee!! no induced labor. i was dancing away *in my mind* :p

when i broke the news, the husband was all calm and cool but got himself ready. (he suddenly had diarrhoe and had been going in and out of the toilet many times before we set off.) the mother was the opposite. she was panicky and i decided we should wait for my dad to return home from work before we went off to the hospital. oh! i even suggested to the husband that we left the house after the peak hour as the roads might be congested with vehicles since it's a weekday. anyway.....still no pain so can wait.

we reached the hospital at 10am and had breakfast again (at my request) at McDonalds. walked abit here and there, sat in the garden parapet to enjoy the cool breeze before i felt more water coming out. ok! time to check-in. :p

after registration (which took sometime as the nurse wasnt convinced i was going into labor probably i dont look like i'm going to give birth till which she later confirmed after she'd checked me), at 11.30am we were walked to the delivery suite. *gulp* da byk kali asek terkencing jer, si husband pulak asek terberak. LoL!

anyway, at 12noon i was checked and had dilated 2.5cm. the gynae came to check again at 4pm and i was 4cm dilated. still a longggg way to go. i was offered epidural but i rejected as i did not feel any pain .... yet. the gynae wasnt pleased with the progress i was making. no pain no good, must top up the antibiotic - she says. she was very sure i'd asked for the epidural when the pain comes.

5.30pm i was checked and i was 5cm dilated. no good...still not much pain. can still endure. again i rejected epidural when offered. by this time i was hungry and my tummy making noises and the throat dry. told the husband to get something to eat and smuggled something back. but he insisted on giving me moral support by going on without food and drink. duh~!!

7.30pm i was 6cm dilated. oh gosh! slow progress. but the pain is getting intense. i was then addicted to the gas and going high. rambling like a drunkard woman. mebbe that's just how a drunk person does i assumed. last offer - any epidural? no was my answer again as i was scared of the needle and pain i've to bear with. i thought mebbe later when they asked, i'd say yes. the gynae stared at me and had that "are you sure" look.

8.45pm here comes more pain. cannot give epidural already. baby crowning and im dilating faster and faster. was told that i had to hook off the mask when i had to push the baby out. slapped myself hard. in my heart, i was cursing to myself for not taking up the offer.asek takot jer...hah! rasakan. padan muka ako so all i can do then was to zikir many times and practise my breathing.

9.30pm i was fully dilated and felt the urge to......berak as i'm too tired to speak, i just teran(push) only to be reminded by the nurse that i was not to push the baby out yet. i insisted that i wanted to poop and the malay nurse told me to hold on while she placed liners on the bed. she told me to do my business and again i do it wrongly. i'm pushing the baby out.

so ok! i said i want to take a breather first and stop pushing. the nurse checked me and told me to try pushing the baby. i pushed with all my might only to see that the husband was controlling his breath. i had accidentally poop! amek ko bau pekong LoL!

the nurse was good. she make me feel relax and gave me encouragement. she said that it's good that i pooped to make way for the baby to come out. cos' if i dont the system inside will be congested....ekekekekek! at least i felt less guilty. i already felt guilty when she had to clean me up. :p

uh-oh! the pain is back. im pushing while the nurse was busy setting up the equipments for delivery. i huff and i puff and i huff and i puff. the nurse must have slap her forehead to see me being so stubborn. (da sakit per...nak tahan macam mana lagik she told me to wait for the gynae who was then delivering another patient. i dont want to wait. so she say ok...we'll try without the gynae.

"the baby's head coming out...keep pushing!" the excited husband was cheering me on. i pushhhhhhhhhh only to give up as i ran out of breath and the head went back in again. heh! catch my breath again..... on the count of three i pushhhhhhhhhhh again and this time, suddenly i felt embarassed cos both husband and the nurse were looking down there so i pulled my legs away from their grasp and closed up. and the baby's head went back in again :p

think the nurse is running out of patience with me that she told me "if you dont open up, your baby will never come out. dont you wanna see your baby?" i just listened while trying to endure the excruciating pain which was all over. just when i closed my eyes tight, breathe in hard and waiting for the count, the gynae came in her suit.

yayyy!! she's finally here.... she was barely there for 10 mins and i was already plucking all my strength and pusshhhh at her count. andddd...out comes the baby. then i went into semi-concious state and i didnt even opened my eyes to look at the gender of the baby when she showed us. "here...it's a girl! pretty baby." i was then hearing voices and my visions were blurred. then i felt the gynae pressing on my tummy and she told me to give a push. huh?! u mean i got another baby inside? that's when i realised i've to push the placenta out.... phew!

and both the nurse and gynae were busy with the baby and me respectively. even when the gynae ask for my permission to give a jab on my thigh and there to stitch me up....i just nod my head. she kept assuring me that there'll be a bit of ants bite pain and i answered her back *in my head* that she could do all she wants cause my whole body is still numb from the labor pains. doesnt even make any difference when she'd to stitch up the episiotomy and poke anywhere she liked.

hah! i felt so weak and was shivering from the cold. mebbe it's not cold....it's just that i'm hungry. couldnt even moved my legs. they hurt alot...perhaps i was very tense and the muscles were kinda stretched. the baby wasnt latched on me too as i was veryyyy drowsy from the gas. i had no idea how she look....only heard the husband describing to me her features. the proud new daddy was then busy craddling the babe and making calls to our parents annoucing the arrival of the family's first grandchild.

he told me the baby smiled while he was doing the prayer for the babe. aik?! baru kuar da pandai senyum....mentel! while she was in the warmer, her legs were already kicking in the air....she must have waited that long to come and see the world that she was very excited once out.

i was left to regain my conciousness and when i was able to speak, i was given a glass of milo by the nice staff nurse. when she wasnt looking i offered hubby the cup and he finished it for me. :p tak sedap tapi jadilah buat ilang haus and then i was later wheeled back into the ward. that day marked the most memorable time in my life.

i couldnt believe it that i had gone through the whole process of being pregnant and going through labor pain and all, which i often read or hear from mothers and now i'm experiencing it myself. i'm now a mommy to a lovely baby girl.



Alhamdulillah! the 11 hour (11.30am till 10.27pm)long labor was definitely worth going through. :)

it's my first day at work today. i've been hit by the blues that all new mommies have to go through. the short separation is unbearable.....

nasib ada sarung bantal bachin nie...ilang sketz rindu :p



i wonder how this chubbypie of mine is coping without me during her feeding time.....


when i made a call home this morning, she was soundly asleep. *sigh* she must be trying very hard not to feel the absence.



i cant wait to get home!


arghhhh.....!!



the time seems to be c-r-a-w-l-i-n-g.....